My Bachelorette Application
A Blues for Fred
The Miracle Porker
Do You Guys Pay Your Fucking Bills or What?
You Don’t Have to Be Grateful for Sex
A Christmas Carol
Happy Birthday
A Case for Remaining Indoors
A Total Attack of the Heart
A Civil Union
Mavis
Fuck It, Bitch. Stay Fat.
Nashville Hot Chicken
I’m in Love and It’s Boring
A Bomb, Probably
The Real Housewife of Kalamazoo
Thirteen Questions to Ask Before Getting Married
Yo, I Need a Job.
Feelings Are a Mistake
We Are Never Meeting in Real Life.
Acknowledgments