Your Body Knows the Answer

Using Your Felt Sense to Solve Problems, Effect Change, and Liberate Creativity

A manual for Mindful Focusing—a new integration of Western psychology and Buddhist mindfulness techniques for accessing your inherent wisdom and solving lifes problems

Ever come up against one of those moments when life requires a response—and you feel clueless? We all have. But there’s good news: you have all the wisdom you need to respond to any situation, even the “impossible” ones. It’s a matter of tuning in to your felt sense: that subtle physical sensation that lives somewhere between your conscious and subconscious mind and that can be accessed through Focusing—the well-known method developed by the psychologist Eugene Gendlin.
 
David Rome’s technique of Mindful Focusing unites Gendlin’s method with Buddhist mindfulness practices to provide a wonderfully effective method for accessing your felt sense—so you can problem solve, deal with challenges, and respond honestly and creatively to the world around you.
Introduction

PART ONE: MAKING FRIENDS IN YOURSELF
1. Steps toward Finding the Felt Sense
Exercise 1.1: Creating a GAP (Grounded Aware Presence)
Exercise 1.2: Friendly Attending
Exercise 1.3: Noticing "something"
2. Three Gates to the Felt Sense
Exercise 2.1: From Physical Sensations to Felt Senses
Exercise 2.2: Dropping the Storyline
3. The Feeling beneath the Feeling
Exercise 3.1: The Feeling beneath the Feeling
4. Cultivating Felt Senses
Exercise 4.1: "How's It Going?"
Exercise 4.2: Noticing What Your Body Is Already Holding
Exercise 4.3: "What Wants My Attention Just Now?"
5. Working with "Situations"
Exercise 5.1: Starting with a Situation
6. Focusing the Felt Sense
Exercise 6.1: Focusing the Felt Sense
7. Requesting Insight from the Felt Sense
Exercise 7.1: Empathic Inquiry
8. Small Steps, Felt Shifts, and Receiving What Comes
Exercise 8.1: Small Steps, Felt Shifts, and Receiving What Comes
Mindful-Focusing Protocol
9. Cultivating Self-Empathy and Defusing the Inner Critic
Exercise 9.1: Befriending the Inner Critic
Interlude
10. Mindfulness, Awareness, and the Sovereign Self
11. The Deep Nature of Life Process

PART TWO: LIVING LIFE FORWARD
12. From Insights to Action Steps
Exercise 12.1: Finding a Right Next Step
13. Deep Listening
Exercise 13.1: Deep Listening
14. Conflict
Exercise 14.1: Vicarious Felt Sense
Exercise 14.2: Taking Turns
15. Making Tough Decisions
Exercise 15.1: Deciding from the Felt Sense
16. Under-Standing
Exercise 16.1: Reading with the Felt Sense
17. "First Thought Best Thought"--Felt Sense in Creative Process
Exercise 17.1: Composing a Haiku
18. Enlarging Space
Exercise 18.1: Enlarging Space
Exercise 18.2: Wandering with Wonder
19. Contemplation: Sensing for the More
Exercise 19.1: Sensing for the More
"Eminently readable, engaging and wise, this book is hugely welcome. Those new to Focusing and the felt sense will be expertly guided; those already familiar with the process will find fresh treasure on every page. Compassionate, warm, and generous in sharing his own journey, Rome is just the person you would want as a companion to opening up your inner world. I know I will be re-reading this book for years and recommending it to all my students and friends."—Ann Weiser Cornell, author of The Power of Focusing and Focusing in Clinical Practice

"David Rome has mastered Focusing, a method for using the body’s wisdom to navigate life’s major decisions. Your Body Knows the Answer makes this invaluable tool available to us all."—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence and Focus

"Reading David Rome’s book opened a forgotten but familiar doorway in my heart that sang, ‘yes!’ He returns us to our bodies, showing us how to access the Felt Sense, the nonconceptual experience of embodied knowing we have been yearning for. He skillfully guides us to wholeness, introducing accessible exercises that form a toolkit for life. Mindful Focusing comes at a perfect time, resting at the nexus of mindfulness, neuroscience, and social-emotional learning, showing the way for us to bridge meditation and daily life, the brain and the heart, Western philosophy and Eastern wisdom. This book is a treasure to savor—and use—again and again."—Acharya Judith Simmer-Brown, Distinguished Professor of Contemplative and Religious Studies, Naropa University, and author of Dakini’s Warm Breath: The Feminine Principle in Tibetan Buddhism

About

A manual for Mindful Focusing—a new integration of Western psychology and Buddhist mindfulness techniques for accessing your inherent wisdom and solving lifes problems

Ever come up against one of those moments when life requires a response—and you feel clueless? We all have. But there’s good news: you have all the wisdom you need to respond to any situation, even the “impossible” ones. It’s a matter of tuning in to your felt sense: that subtle physical sensation that lives somewhere between your conscious and subconscious mind and that can be accessed through Focusing—the well-known method developed by the psychologist Eugene Gendlin.
 
David Rome’s technique of Mindful Focusing unites Gendlin’s method with Buddhist mindfulness practices to provide a wonderfully effective method for accessing your felt sense—so you can problem solve, deal with challenges, and respond honestly and creatively to the world around you.

Table of Contents

Introduction

PART ONE: MAKING FRIENDS IN YOURSELF
1. Steps toward Finding the Felt Sense
Exercise 1.1: Creating a GAP (Grounded Aware Presence)
Exercise 1.2: Friendly Attending
Exercise 1.3: Noticing "something"
2. Three Gates to the Felt Sense
Exercise 2.1: From Physical Sensations to Felt Senses
Exercise 2.2: Dropping the Storyline
3. The Feeling beneath the Feeling
Exercise 3.1: The Feeling beneath the Feeling
4. Cultivating Felt Senses
Exercise 4.1: "How's It Going?"
Exercise 4.2: Noticing What Your Body Is Already Holding
Exercise 4.3: "What Wants My Attention Just Now?"
5. Working with "Situations"
Exercise 5.1: Starting with a Situation
6. Focusing the Felt Sense
Exercise 6.1: Focusing the Felt Sense
7. Requesting Insight from the Felt Sense
Exercise 7.1: Empathic Inquiry
8. Small Steps, Felt Shifts, and Receiving What Comes
Exercise 8.1: Small Steps, Felt Shifts, and Receiving What Comes
Mindful-Focusing Protocol
9. Cultivating Self-Empathy and Defusing the Inner Critic
Exercise 9.1: Befriending the Inner Critic
Interlude
10. Mindfulness, Awareness, and the Sovereign Self
11. The Deep Nature of Life Process

PART TWO: LIVING LIFE FORWARD
12. From Insights to Action Steps
Exercise 12.1: Finding a Right Next Step
13. Deep Listening
Exercise 13.1: Deep Listening
14. Conflict
Exercise 14.1: Vicarious Felt Sense
Exercise 14.2: Taking Turns
15. Making Tough Decisions
Exercise 15.1: Deciding from the Felt Sense
16. Under-Standing
Exercise 16.1: Reading with the Felt Sense
17. "First Thought Best Thought"--Felt Sense in Creative Process
Exercise 17.1: Composing a Haiku
18. Enlarging Space
Exercise 18.1: Enlarging Space
Exercise 18.2: Wandering with Wonder
19. Contemplation: Sensing for the More
Exercise 19.1: Sensing for the More

Praise

"Eminently readable, engaging and wise, this book is hugely welcome. Those new to Focusing and the felt sense will be expertly guided; those already familiar with the process will find fresh treasure on every page. Compassionate, warm, and generous in sharing his own journey, Rome is just the person you would want as a companion to opening up your inner world. I know I will be re-reading this book for years and recommending it to all my students and friends."—Ann Weiser Cornell, author of The Power of Focusing and Focusing in Clinical Practice

"David Rome has mastered Focusing, a method for using the body’s wisdom to navigate life’s major decisions. Your Body Knows the Answer makes this invaluable tool available to us all."—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence and Focus

"Reading David Rome’s book opened a forgotten but familiar doorway in my heart that sang, ‘yes!’ He returns us to our bodies, showing us how to access the Felt Sense, the nonconceptual experience of embodied knowing we have been yearning for. He skillfully guides us to wholeness, introducing accessible exercises that form a toolkit for life. Mindful Focusing comes at a perfect time, resting at the nexus of mindfulness, neuroscience, and social-emotional learning, showing the way for us to bridge meditation and daily life, the brain and the heart, Western philosophy and Eastern wisdom. This book is a treasure to savor—and use—again and again."—Acharya Judith Simmer-Brown, Distinguished Professor of Contemplative and Religious Studies, Naropa University, and author of Dakini’s Warm Breath: The Feminine Principle in Tibetan Buddhism