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Every Single Woman's Battle

Guarding Your Heart and Mind Against Sexual and Emotional Compromise

Part of The Every Man Series

Author Shannon Ethridge
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$13.99 US
Christian/Forum | WaterBrook
48 per carton
On sale Aug 16, 2005 | 978-1-4000-7127-2
Sales rights: World
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Powerful Tools for Guarding Your Body, Mind, and Heart
 
Remaining pure while single isn’t easy in a culture that encourages a woman to use her body to gain power, respect, and personal fulfillment. The longing for emotional and physical connection can gradually and subtly lead you into compromises you never intended to make. But you can resist the pressures—or reclaim your purity—by building a strong foundation of integrity.
 
This book, ideal for study with Every Woman’s Battle, is designed specifically for single women and will give you the tools you need to resist temptation and discover true fulfillment. Through practical and biblical lessons you’ll be equipped to:

· understand the unique components of female sexuality
· discern your personal areas of vulnerability
· design a defense plan to protect your heart and mind, as well as your body
· allow God to satisfy the desires He placed within you
 
Each weekly study section—designed both for individual and small group use in eight-week or twelve-week tracks—guides you deeper into God’s Word, then helps you personalize and apply the principles that will help you live in sexual and emotional purity.
 

Whose Battle Is It?

At one time I was having extramarital affairs with five different men.…Even though I wasn’t having sexual intercourse with any of these other men, I was still having an affair with each of them—a mental and/or emotional affair. My fantasies of being Clark Gable’s leading lady, memories of my romantic relationship with Ray, and fascination with
Tom’s wit, Mark’s maturity, and Scott’s verbal talents affected my marriage in a way just as damaging as a sexual affair would have.

When I hear people say that women don’t struggle with sexual issues like men do, I cannot help but wonder what planet they are from or what rock they have been hiding under. Perhaps what they really mean is, the physical act of sex isn’t an overwhelming temptation for women like it is for men.

Men and women struggle in different ways when it comes to sexual integrity.While a man’s battle begins with what he takes in through his eyes, a woman’s begins with her heart and her thoughts. A man must guard his eyes to maintain sexual integrity, but because God made women to be emotionally and mentally stimulated, we must closely guard our hearts and minds as well as our bodies if we want to experience God’s plan for sexual and emotional fulfillment. A woman’s battle is for sexual and emotional integrity.

Paul understood our very human tendency to live in denial, closing our eyes to the things in our lives that may need to change. Change is hard work, and we would rather stay as we are. But this is not how God has called us to live. He wants to help us control our minds and our desires so that we can be more like Him. He wants to help us discover His plan for relational satisfaction. But we can’t do this if we insist on keeping our eyes closed to the compromise that robs
us of ultimate sexual and emotional fulfillment.

PLANTING GOOD SEEDS
(Personally Seeking God’s Truth)

1. How important is theWord of God to you? Why?

As you seek to discover God’s plan for sexual and emotional fulfillment, plant these good seeds in your heart:

The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from
that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows
to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal
life. (Galatians 6:8)

Each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he
is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has
conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is
full-grown, gives birth to death. ( James 1:14-15)

2. What, if anything, in these verses feels like a threat or a warning to you?Why do you think you respond to the verses the way you do?

To increase your hope of winning the battle for sexual and emotional integrity, plant this good seed from 1 Corinthians 10:13 in your heart:

No temptation has seized you except what is common
to [woman]. And God is faithful; he will not
let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But
when you are tempted, he will also provide a way
out so that you can stand up under it.

3. What does this promise mean to you?

WEEDING OUT DECEPTION
(Recognizing the Truth)

In some way or another sexual and emotional integrity is a battle that every woman fights. However, many women are fighting this battle with their eyes closed because they don’t believe they are even engaged in the battle.Many believe that just because they are not involved in a physical, sexual affair, they don’t have a problem with sexual and emotional integrity. As a result, they engage in thoughts and behaviors that compromise their integrity and rob
them of true sexual and emotional fulfillment.

4. Do you agree with the statement that every woman fights the battle for sexual and emotional integrity? On what do you base your opinion?

5. The author warns that it is not wise to think that sexual immorality can’t happen to any one of us. How prevalent do you think sexual immorality is among Christian singles?
Copyright © 2005 by Shannon Ethridge. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Praise for Every Woman’s Battle and Every Young Woman’s Battle by Shannon Ethridge

“There is a common, almost Victorian, myth that women don’t really struggle with sexual sin. That myth causes many women to feel a double shame.The shame of struggling sexually is compounded by the assumption that few, if any, women share the same battle. Shannon Ethridge artfully and boldly unveils the war and offers women a way to enter the battle with courage, hope, and grace. Every Woman’s Battle will help both men and women comprehend the glorious beauty and sensuality of holiness. This is a desperately needed book.”
—DAN B. ALLENDER, PHD, president of Mars Hill Graduate School and author of The Healing Path

“This book sheds light on the often unspoken sensitivities and issues that women wrestle with. Not only is it well written, it is liberating and refreshing, with sound principles for overcoming the things that threaten to keep us from experiencing the fullness of joy that is part of God’s big picture plan for our lives.”
—MICHELLE MCKINNEY HAMMOND, speaker, singer, and author of Get Over It and On With It

“A ‘powerful shield’ for every woman. Shannon’s words are convicting, challenging, and confronting.”
—DR. TIM CLINTON, president of the American Association of Christian Counselors

“Many of my Bad Girls of the Bible readers have tearfully confessed to me their struggles with sexual sins—promiscuity, adultery, and self-gratification among them. Since we cannot pretend Christian women don’t face these temptations, it’s a relief to have a sound resource like this one to recommend. Shannon Ethridge’s straightforward, nonjudgmental, step-bystep approach can help women ‘come clean’ in the best way possible—through an intimate relationship with the Lover of their souls.”
—LIZ CURTIS HIGGS, best-selling author of Bad Girls of the Bible and Here Burns My Candle

“If you’re like me, you are going to find Shannon’s book immeasurably helpful. Every Woman’s Battle is the best resource I know for embracing God’s plan of sexual and emotional integrity as a woman.”
—LESLIE PARROTT, coauthor of Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts

About

Powerful Tools for Guarding Your Body, Mind, and Heart
 
Remaining pure while single isn’t easy in a culture that encourages a woman to use her body to gain power, respect, and personal fulfillment. The longing for emotional and physical connection can gradually and subtly lead you into compromises you never intended to make. But you can resist the pressures—or reclaim your purity—by building a strong foundation of integrity.
 
This book, ideal for study with Every Woman’s Battle, is designed specifically for single women and will give you the tools you need to resist temptation and discover true fulfillment. Through practical and biblical lessons you’ll be equipped to:

· understand the unique components of female sexuality
· discern your personal areas of vulnerability
· design a defense plan to protect your heart and mind, as well as your body
· allow God to satisfy the desires He placed within you
 
Each weekly study section—designed both for individual and small group use in eight-week or twelve-week tracks—guides you deeper into God’s Word, then helps you personalize and apply the principles that will help you live in sexual and emotional purity.
 

Excerpt

Whose Battle Is It?

At one time I was having extramarital affairs with five different men.…Even though I wasn’t having sexual intercourse with any of these other men, I was still having an affair with each of them—a mental and/or emotional affair. My fantasies of being Clark Gable’s leading lady, memories of my romantic relationship with Ray, and fascination with
Tom’s wit, Mark’s maturity, and Scott’s verbal talents affected my marriage in a way just as damaging as a sexual affair would have.

When I hear people say that women don’t struggle with sexual issues like men do, I cannot help but wonder what planet they are from or what rock they have been hiding under. Perhaps what they really mean is, the physical act of sex isn’t an overwhelming temptation for women like it is for men.

Men and women struggle in different ways when it comes to sexual integrity.While a man’s battle begins with what he takes in through his eyes, a woman’s begins with her heart and her thoughts. A man must guard his eyes to maintain sexual integrity, but because God made women to be emotionally and mentally stimulated, we must closely guard our hearts and minds as well as our bodies if we want to experience God’s plan for sexual and emotional fulfillment. A woman’s battle is for sexual and emotional integrity.

Paul understood our very human tendency to live in denial, closing our eyes to the things in our lives that may need to change. Change is hard work, and we would rather stay as we are. But this is not how God has called us to live. He wants to help us control our minds and our desires so that we can be more like Him. He wants to help us discover His plan for relational satisfaction. But we can’t do this if we insist on keeping our eyes closed to the compromise that robs
us of ultimate sexual and emotional fulfillment.

PLANTING GOOD SEEDS
(Personally Seeking God’s Truth)

1. How important is theWord of God to you? Why?

As you seek to discover God’s plan for sexual and emotional fulfillment, plant these good seeds in your heart:

The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from
that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows
to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal
life. (Galatians 6:8)

Each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he
is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has
conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is
full-grown, gives birth to death. ( James 1:14-15)

2. What, if anything, in these verses feels like a threat or a warning to you?Why do you think you respond to the verses the way you do?

To increase your hope of winning the battle for sexual and emotional integrity, plant this good seed from 1 Corinthians 10:13 in your heart:

No temptation has seized you except what is common
to [woman]. And God is faithful; he will not
let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But
when you are tempted, he will also provide a way
out so that you can stand up under it.

3. What does this promise mean to you?

WEEDING OUT DECEPTION
(Recognizing the Truth)

In some way or another sexual and emotional integrity is a battle that every woman fights. However, many women are fighting this battle with their eyes closed because they don’t believe they are even engaged in the battle.Many believe that just because they are not involved in a physical, sexual affair, they don’t have a problem with sexual and emotional integrity. As a result, they engage in thoughts and behaviors that compromise their integrity and rob
them of true sexual and emotional fulfillment.

4. Do you agree with the statement that every woman fights the battle for sexual and emotional integrity? On what do you base your opinion?

5. The author warns that it is not wise to think that sexual immorality can’t happen to any one of us. How prevalent do you think sexual immorality is among Christian singles?
Copyright © 2005 by Shannon Ethridge. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.

Praise

Praise for Every Woman’s Battle and Every Young Woman’s Battle by Shannon Ethridge

“There is a common, almost Victorian, myth that women don’t really struggle with sexual sin. That myth causes many women to feel a double shame.The shame of struggling sexually is compounded by the assumption that few, if any, women share the same battle. Shannon Ethridge artfully and boldly unveils the war and offers women a way to enter the battle with courage, hope, and grace. Every Woman’s Battle will help both men and women comprehend the glorious beauty and sensuality of holiness. This is a desperately needed book.”
—DAN B. ALLENDER, PHD, president of Mars Hill Graduate School and author of The Healing Path

“This book sheds light on the often unspoken sensitivities and issues that women wrestle with. Not only is it well written, it is liberating and refreshing, with sound principles for overcoming the things that threaten to keep us from experiencing the fullness of joy that is part of God’s big picture plan for our lives.”
—MICHELLE MCKINNEY HAMMOND, speaker, singer, and author of Get Over It and On With It

“A ‘powerful shield’ for every woman. Shannon’s words are convicting, challenging, and confronting.”
—DR. TIM CLINTON, president of the American Association of Christian Counselors

“Many of my Bad Girls of the Bible readers have tearfully confessed to me their struggles with sexual sins—promiscuity, adultery, and self-gratification among them. Since we cannot pretend Christian women don’t face these temptations, it’s a relief to have a sound resource like this one to recommend. Shannon Ethridge’s straightforward, nonjudgmental, step-bystep approach can help women ‘come clean’ in the best way possible—through an intimate relationship with the Lover of their souls.”
—LIZ CURTIS HIGGS, best-selling author of Bad Girls of the Bible and Here Burns My Candle

“If you’re like me, you are going to find Shannon’s book immeasurably helpful. Every Woman’s Battle is the best resource I know for embracing God’s plan of sexual and emotional integrity as a woman.”
—LESLIE PARROTT, coauthor of Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts

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